The many different lakes around Arkansas, would appeal to every one who loves water sports, and relaxing in an unbelievable beautiful fairy tail land.    There are more than 600,000 acres of lakes, and some are the cleanest in the world.  The lakes that set in the mountains are best for fishing, and the view is breathtaking  It is certain that fisherman will catch prize winning, trophy fish.  Scuba divers and underwater photographers, will love how clear the water is.

Then there are lakes and rivers you can enjoy near El Dorado, Arkansas, where you can camp, hike, white water rafting, backpacking, anything you wish to do on your vacation.  For more information on vacationing in Arkansas go to:

The first thing you must remember is that you are not alone.  There are at least ten million widows in the world, that has gone through what you are going through now.  The pain of loss, the loneliness, the fear of what is to come, and the feelings that your loved one will walk through the door any moment and say, it's all a dream, a nightmare.  Because there are so many people who go through this, and everyone will at some time in their lives, almost every one around you, has knowledge on how to get through it.  They will have the sympathy, solace and empathy to give the help you will need at first, and want you to lean on them, do.

Anger is a normal feeling of loss,  why me?  Guilt, also, is a feeling, most widows feel.  Why didn't I know what was happening and stop it?  Why did I fight with him the last time I saw him?  These feeling are normal and should be thought about, but they are negative and destructive, so if you keep them around for a long time, you may see your family and friends start to move away from you. 

After the distraction of the funeral, and your family and friends have gone beck to their lives, and you still feel angry and guilty, it is time to seek help from  professionals.  There are organizations out there, that know how to look at death and dying.  They can help you with the anger before it gets so deep you can't control it.  They will help with the guilt, before it encumbers your whole life.  If you are a young widow, and have children, take them with you.  They are going through the same pain, but with much more confusion.  The funeral director can guide you to where to find help, and your family physician, and church, can  slso help.

It seems cruel to make a widow/widower, make funeral arrangements after the death of their spouse.  Through the tears and fog, you have to first call the family and close friends to let them know what has happened and you have to make decisions on how your loved-one is buried.  What casket to pick or an urn, if you decide to cremate, and, who will officiate, and, who will participate in the actual ceremony.  Planning a funeral at that time, seems huge to the one left behind.  But, concentrating on the business of planning a funeral takes the stress off of the realization of what has just happened.

Notifying your next of kin, family, is the first step you have to take.  Your close family will then, be willing and able to notify your close friends and  theirs. Your close family members will want to be with you through the rest of the preparations too, so, let them, you will need them, because, picking a casket or urn in a large room full of caskets and urns is overwhelming.  When you make your decision on the casket or urn, you will also be making the decision on how much you can pay for the whole funeral, which is a big hurtle.  You have to know how much you have in the bank, insurance policy's, and, retirement funds.  So you have to contact insurance agents, your bank, refer to your loved-ones will, to see what their wishes are after death.  After all that you will have to decide if you want a wake or visitation, and then write an obituary to notify your community that your loved-one has died. 

The life of  a women will drastically change after her husbands death.  At first the pure shock will be numbing and cruel, even if he lingers over a debilitating illness.  But, the shock is buffeted by the business of having to prepare for a funeral.  When the final goodbyes are said and the family and friends go back to their own lives, the widow is left to cope with depression, loneliness and the stress of living on, with out the one person she wrapped her life around.  The husband is usually the bread winner of the family, so the widow will have to cope with less money or no money coming in at all. 

The husband who looses his wife, to death, is also numb and in shock too.  He has to prepare for a funeral, which will keep him busy for a short time, and, like the widow, his friends and family will surround him until the last goodbyes.  The difference between the two, would be there are many more widows than widowers, because, women out live men almost 5 to 1.  And, the widowers life will not change as drastically, because their work and retirement benefits will not change.  Loneliness is a debilitating mind set, for both widowers and widows.  The widower will have to cope with loneliness more, because it is usually the wife who sets the social calendar and finds the friends.  Because men do not go to other  people for help, they will try to anesthetize their loneliness with alcohol or drugs, which is dangerous.

You are a widow, your husband has died and that part of your life has died too.  After the shock and you have resigned to the fact that, you are now on your own, and, you are fully responsible for your well being, you begin to wonder how.

The social security survivors benefits, for widows, are there to help.  A person who has worked all their life and dies, can leave survivors benefits for certain members of his family.  There are full benefits if you, the widow, is at full retirement age.  You may receive your husbands social security, in stead of your own, if his is more.  If you are not yet at retirement age, you can receive a reduced benefit starting at age 60.  This can be a big help.

If you are divorced and are taking care of the deceased's children, under the age of 16, or they are disabled, the deceased's social security, will go to the well being of those children.  You should also look into survivor benefits, for stepchildren, adopted children, and even grandchildren.   Also, the parents of the deceased, at the age of 62 and older, if they are dependent on the help of the deceased, before he died, can receive benefits too.